Jake of the Web

An woman documenting the things her husband says while talking in his sleep. Apparently he's pretty prolific:


"No, not the cats. Don't trust them. Their eyes. Their eyes. They know too much."

"Don't leave the duck there. It's totally irresponsible. Put it on the swing, it'll have much more fun."

"Ooh! My balls are itchy. Have you got the cheese grater?"

"Awesome. Teddy bears bungie jumping."

"Badger tickling: proceed with caution"

"Elephant trunks should be used for elephant things only. Nothing else."

"Put it down! Step away from the yam. Step away!"

"Vegetarians will be the first to go. That's my plan. Vegans haven't got a hope. 'I eat air, I'm so healthy...' Bollocks!"

"Sigh of a ninja."

"It's definitely time to get up. Yes. My dog needs a new tutu."

"I love the fact you're a moose. Yes. So soft, so soft."

"Is it me, or has the ground gone to jelly? Fun. I can bounce... Bounce... Fun."

"So this is what it feels like to be a gummy bear... I can't walk though, I have to rock... I think i'll call myself BerNARD. Not BERnard. BerNARD. And I'll be a golden gummy bear."

"Hey I know you, but I don't like your face. Take it off... That's much better, much better."

"Give me back my hands! Limb thief!"


http://www.sleeptalkinman.blogspot.com/
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